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On Feelings

Posted on: 02/27/22 14:32:25
Last edited: 02/27/22 14:32:25

On feelings


Today. I woke up sunday twenty-seventh, twenty twenty-two at about twelve hours and thirteen minutes.

My parents attempted to wake me up earlier but were partially unsuccessful. I dont’t remember much about what I was thinking about whilst still in bed. Point is, I woke up. I went to the bathroom. Maybe I peed. I put water on my face and rubbed it in with my fingers, feeling the oil kinda come off and stick to my finger tips. I then washed my hands with my blue soap.

After that I checked my phone. Nothing important. Just messages that are kind of irrelevant to me on a Sunday noon. I then proceedes to go downstairs - to the kitchen. I then though about what to eat. The bread was out, in its plastic bag, beside the fruits. The toaster was not there. I walked into the pantry, not much to eat or at least that I’d be interested in eating.

Then I though, why not make some tostadas españolas ? And place a couple of sunny-side-up eggs on top.

tostadas españolas is a Spanish dish that consists mainly of raw garlic, tomatoes, and toasted bread. Like the bread you use for a PJ sandwich. You grind the tomato so you get this partially liquid, partially solid cream. You put in a bowl. I don’t filter out the seeds. I get some garlic teeth (not sure how you say it), you peel off the skin, cut each of them in half. Then toast the bread to your liking. After the bread is toasted, put on some plated, take the cut side of the garlic and spread it around whilst holding it with your fingers. Spread! The heat of the toast makes some of the garlic come off. Spread it all around like some marmalade / jelly.

Then put the tomato grinded cream on the toasts. That is a tostada española. As you may recall, I mentioned some eggs. Sunny-side-up. That’s how I like them. make them however you like them. Just place the eggs on top of the toasts and voilà!

You got yourself some tostadas españolas with a couple of eggs. Keep in mind to get the timing right. I did not tell you when to start cooking the eggs. But the way I did it was I started to cook them. then after about 20 seconds I started the toaster. By this point in time, I have already grinded the tomato and cut the garlics. I’ve prepared the plates. The toasts are now done after 2-3 minutes. I let them rest in the toaster, with some heat still coming off it. Eggs almost done, I’m turning the heat completely off. Now I go to the toasts, put them on a plate and start spreading the garlic around. Then the tomato thing.

Now I get the eggs ans gently place them over the toasts.

It is done! Parfait! Feast and eat!


after all that breakfast thing I washed all my plates and the cheese grater (which I uses to grind the tomatoes) along with my fork and knifes. Then I enjoyed some of the sun in my backyard, with some grass here and there.

After that, (I think) I messaged someone. They were busy. I was kinda stressed.

I haven’t actually talked to that person in a day or two. Then I decides to go watch a TV Show. But I remembered to take my stupid meds. I drank some water.

Then headed upstairs to the TV. Turned it on. Opened the app, prepared to click on the profile my parents arrived.

I had promised my father that I’d do some exercise. I haven’t done any. Yet. So I left the TV, took my phone and headphones. Put on some shorts, a t-shirt (I was in pijamas) and headed out to walk in my neighbourhood.

My Mom recommended I take the dog.

So I did. I was lazy to take a bag for its poop. But I mentally swore to myself that I’d go back for one when I was finished and pick it up.

So I looked for some sandals. It was sunny. I wanted sandals. I was wearing crocs. Good enough. I opened the door, called my dog, then headed outside and partially closed it.

Me, as I’m writing this:

i should probably take a shower, I’m kinda late for a family reunion.

Ok, so I started walking and was kinda sad about not being able to talk to that person before.

I started playing in order the Random Access Memories album from Daft Punk. I don’t think I’ve paid enough attention to all the songs. People say it’s very good.

So I listened to them. I skipped one song because I was kinda frustrated about the lyrics since it reminded me of some feelings.

Then I began to think about isolation. I hadn’t been this alone in a while. Just with my thoughts, music, and shit.

So I decided to make a ritual. An isolation ritual, just as I was walking.

That person is busy, so let’s just get our minds off that and try to be happy. I won’t be taking much care of my dog. I’ll let it be free. I’ll go for her poop later. It’s a gated community so she’ll be just fine.

Then I though about some weird religion which said to walk barefoot. Though about it.

Then thought about some cultures that put their bare feet no socks no shoes on burning charcoal.

It was hot outside. I was walking on pavement. Then I got to grass. I walked barefoot on grass.

It felt nice. All this whilst playing the RAM album from daft punk. There was a party yesterday. Seemed fun. I was scared yesterday to go say hi. Plus, I hadn’t been invited. I didn’t go to the party yesterday, yet it was so close! Like one minute away! -walking!!!

So I went to the back of the shared grounds with grass and plants. I found poop. A big one. Not from my dog definitely. It was dry. At least five day’s I’d say. But I mentally promised to pick this up.

I went to my house. Not for poop bag. But to take my crocs off and walk bare foot - no socks no shoes no nothing.

Just me and my feet with human skin.

The pavement is hot. It’s nice to feel my toes with the pavement.

It’s nice walking. It’s getting real hot. I’m probably getting blisters (ampollas for spanish, I hope).

who cares ? this is my ritual. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

this is how my dog walks anyways. poor thing. But eventually I reached grass, decided not to step on any until the end of the road.

motivates myself to keep on walking (this feels similar to the Scatman’s World song!?).

I then proceeded to tho around three to four laps. That’s it.

It helped me calm down.

I wrote this partially in the bathroom. I don’t know why I’m writing this. Goodbye, I’ll go get a shower.

Tags: day eat breakfast